Tackling the Taboo: how to discuss money with family

Money remains one of the most uncomfortable topics to bring up with family. In fact, our research discovered that 40% of UK adults believe that discussing inheritance is the ‘last great family taboo’.

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Despite its importance, many people avoid these conversations, often until it’s too late. Whether it’s discussing inheritance, planning for the future, or simply sharing financial realities, money remains a sensitive subject—especially within families.

So why is it so difficult to talk about money with those closest to us?

The emotional weight of money conversations

One of the biggest barriers is cultural. In many societies, money is considered a private matter, not to be discussed openly—even among family members. When financial discussions intersect with family dynamics, emotions can run high. These conversations often bring up feelings of vulnerability, guilt, or fear of judgment.

Our research found that the most common reason for avoiding money talk is that it “isn’t necessary at this time” (44%)—a noncommittal answer that hints at discomfort. The reality is that preparedness is always valuable, as life rarely announces its big moments in advance. Emotions play a key role in causing families to avoid talking about finances. Many respondents cite awkwardness or discomfort about the topic, fear of causing conflict, and a belief that finances are a private matter. Notably, 14% say they simply don’t know how to start the conversation.

Adding to the discomfort is the fact that many of these discussions are tied to topics like aging, illness, and death. Estate planning, for example, forces people to confront their mortality and make decisions about what happens after they’re gone. This emotional weight can make it easier to delay or avoid the conversation altogether.

The power of early conversations

Yet starting these conversations early could make a significant difference. When discussions happen before a crisis, there’s more time to think clearly, ask questions, and make informed decisions. It also allows families to address potential issues—such as unequal distributions or differing expectations—before they become problems.

Our research discovered that only 26% of respondents say they regularly discuss financial matters with their family, while a third (34%) say they do so rarely or never. However, for those who do have regular conversations, the benefits are clear. Half (50%) of those who talk with their children about finances say it builds trust, and 47% believe it fosters an understanding of the importance of saving and investing.

This preparedness is a key theme: other benefits include preparing children to manage their own finances, building their financial literacy, and ensuring they are aware of inheritance plans.

Early conversations can also help normalise talking about money. By making it a regular part of family life, rather than a one-time event, it becomes easier to approach the topic with openness and honesty.

Shifting the focus

One helpful approach is to shift the focus from “how much” to “how.” Instead of centring the conversation on the amount of money involved, families can talk about the process:

• Where is the money held?

• How is it managed?

• What are the plans for its use?

• Who are the key advisers involved?

This practical framing could reduce emotional tension and help everyone feel more comfortable.

The role of professional support

Professional advisers—such as financial planners, solicitors, and accountants—can play a valuable role in facilitating these conversations. Their expertise and neutrality may help guide families through complex decisions and ensure that nothing important is overlooked.

For example, making a will is a critical step in ensuring that your wishes are carried out. It allows you to decide who inherits your estate, who will manage it, and who will care for any minor children. Without a will, these decisions are left to legal rules that may not reflect your intentions.

Similarly, setting up a lasting power of attorney ensures that someone you trust can make decisions on your behalf if you become unable to do so. Worryingly, we found that three-quarters (73%) of people do not have a power of attorney, despite its critical importance in the event of illness or incapacity.

These are not just legal documents—they are tools for peace of mind and protection.

Overcoming the fear

If you’re worried about starting a money conversation with your family, you’re not alone. Many people feel the same way. But avoiding the topic doesn’t make the need go away—it only increases the risk of confusion and conflict later on.

To make the conversation easier, consider the following:

• Choose the right time and setting—avoid high-stress moments or public gatherings.

• Think about who should start the conversation and how to frame it.

• Be clear about your intentions—this is about planning, not control.

• Be open to listening as well as sharing.

Remember, these conversations don’t have to happen all at once. They can be ongoing, evolving as circumstances change.

Ultimately, talking about money with your family is an act of care. It’s about ensuring that your loved ones are informed, prepared, and supported. By breaking the silence and tackling the taboo, you can help create a legacy not just of wealth, but of understanding, trust, and connection.

Important information

This article is for information purposes only. It is not intended as advice.

Schroders Personal Wealth does not provide estate planning and administration, trust management or will writing, however we can introduce you to a relevant specialist. We might receive a referral fee from some of the partners we introduce to you.

Any views expressed are our in-house views as at the time of publishing.

This content may not be used, copied, quoted, circulated or otherwise disclosed (in whole or part) without our prior written consent.